1.04.2012

LIVE BETTER

Happy New Year! I've been MIA lately, for a variety of reasons. One, we've had annoying network issues, and two, I just haven't had anything inspiring to post. Nothing new to report. Same stuff, different day. I've just been a-floating, drifting along, immersed in the every day grind. Yet again, I've found myself drowning in a mental funk, and once again, I'm ready to tackle it and begin living the life I was meant to live. I want to find meaning in everything I do. Don't get me wrong, there's much to be grateful for including a wonderful family, two goofy dogs and I job I enjoy so much so that I don't (always) cringe when my alarm sounds at 5:00 a.m. However, I still haven't reached my potential, creatively speaking, and it's taken a toll on my soul. In fact, I've had artist block for so long that I don't know quite where to start. As a result, it's just been easier to keep it on the back burner, which, in turn, has made me a lazy thinker. Not cool. As I mentioned in my previous post, I've been mentally exhausted. I'm a full-time, working mom. Of course, I'm going to be mentally exhausted, especially in my profession as an art teacher. At the end of the day, after a long day at work dealing with dozens of personalities, shuttling kids around to after school activities, running errands, making dinner, supervising homework & chores, trying to squeeze in a workout, in addition to spending quality time with the family & pets, and catching up with friends, there's just not much left of me. On the other hand, it is inspiring to work with so many creative people on a daily basis. I have no excuse not to get my hands dirty in my art supplies every day, even if it's simply doing a demonstration (In fact, one of my demonstrations was the inspiration for a piece that made it into a juried show a few years ago.). My problem is if I'm too overwhelmed to overcome certain obstacles, I will just ignore them until I can't progress any further and have no choice but to dive in and conquer the task. This method has lead me down the road to Nowhere far too many times.

For the longest time, I haven't made any new year's resolutions because I believe if you want to make a change in your life, there's no better time than the present. Why wait? However, I do agree that the start of a new year is a great time to make a fresh start. It feels like a new beginning, and I can't help but set new goals. Last year, I chose a one-word theme, but after a few months, I lost focus, and eventually let the bad habits sneak back in. This year, I'm adopting a mantra: LIVE BETTER (hence the title of this post). I think it will stick in my mind better than a single theme. I can apply it to everything in my life I'd like to change to be healthier & happier such as eating better, sleeping better, exercising better, prioritizing better and organizing my time better to be able to do the things I want to do. Basically, make better choices. I want to make my time more meaningful with everything I do. I want to be consciously aware of where I am at any moment and stop drifting into the world in my head. I've been living up there for far too long. By publishing this post for the world to see, I hope to be more accountable for my actions, meaningful or not, as there's nothing I dislike more than flakiness, and I certainly don't want to be what I despise. Being the chronic (speaking of flakiness) blogger that I am, I know better than to promise to post my updates, but will do so when I feel inspired. Wish me luck. Best wishes to everyone for 2012!

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